I just got fired. No really. About one week ago. AND from someone YOUNGER than me. I was so upset and devastated. It was that feeling at the pit of your stomach that triggers everything that ever told you that you were less than and not capable. I was upset because the job was actually WAY lower than my qualifications and my pay grade. But somehow I questioned ME? I questioned me even as it could have been seen as an opportunity for Me to be pushed out of something that confined me into something that LIBERATED me. I was depressed. Self judgmental. Mad. Acting out on establishment. Acting out on ME. Even when at the end of the day it just proved to be DIVINE INTERVENTION. No this is not for the religious or spiritual. This is for the intuitive and truth filled.
When you first get fired it creates a complex set of emotions ranging from shame, anger, to insecurity. Maybe some of us grapple with an old history of already not being good employees, or not getting what we deserve, or always outdoing until we burn out. Whatever the case, it raises a LOT of emotions. Let’s find out how to deal with them in my list of Re’s. . .
#1 ReAccept: Yeah at first we thought this is where we were supposed to be, but maybe not. Maybe this was a path toward something greater. Either way accept where you are and then reaccept another mission. I think that first we have to accept these initial painful and/or angry/ and or/ relieved emotions. We need to honor them as real and valid and shut out the voices that say they are NOT. After all, if they were “not valid” why would we feel this way?
#2 ReProp it: Give yourself some props! After all of that takes place we need to congratulate ourselves for what we DID do: In the ways that we DID serve the company (because it wasn’t ALL bad) and the ways we DID hang in there. Honestly. Just as we were fired for a reason we were also HIRED for a reason. Even if we were not able to fulfill all of our requirements, we need to know we filled some. No matter how small or large.
#3 ReOwn It: Own it like you own your new bombass shoes. Yes there could have been a lot of areas we may have been better but maybe we weren’t there yet. I get it. But what should stop us from seeing mistakes instead of room for improvement? Our own low self esteem and perceptions.
#4 RePhrase it: So what? We got fired. Oh Well. Do we see it as a decline in our ability, or perceptions forced on us that we are not capable by outsiders. An idea of what we were not able to do? Or what we were supposed to “maintain? Whatever the deal- Declare that we are DONE with external influences as well as beating ourselves up. We are DONE with our past. GAME OVER. START FRESH.
#5 Reflect: Wait- COULD we have done better? I save this for after the rephrase because too often we attack ourselves first. But yes- there may have been areas we need to be better. What do we do? Just improve for next time. It does not make us any less wrong or them ANY LESS RIGHT.
#6 RETHINK: Is this REALLY what we want or what we are destined to do? Sometimes these things happen out of our of subconscious. A self sabotage or a greater design that this is either NOT what we are supposed to do or that we are supposed to do it DIFFERENT. Did we believe in the company/organization, or did we begin to see things that were missing that we can now go expand? Were they in line with who we are or our values? Now is the time to take inventory to our next move.
#7 REDEFINE: Do NOT let this experience define who you are. You are not a LOSER or incompetent. You are an EMPRESS who is where she is and destined for great (or greater) things still.
#8 ReAlign: With who we are and our greater purpose. We have to realize that we are in a world where the old is not the new. Where we as women are under constant attack from a system designed around male hegemony- aka the “current status quo.” Forget that. This could be that one moment meant to tell us what we have been settling for, forcing ourselves to be, or on the verge of becoming the nucleus to a new paradigm.
So SHIFT IT GIRLFRIENDS! Use this to become BETTER and STRONGER and show the world that we cannot be HELD DOWN! Me getting fired led to me realizing how much I was not being appreciated, how much I still needed to work on, and how much I had a greater vision that was not being satisfied by my current job (aka “THEIR LOSS”) I hope you take this time to do the same. In chinese scriptics CRISES is when this happens: Danger meets Opportunity. TAKE YOURS… Opportunity I mean. xo